Let’s face it, the average American couple doesn’t have 8 kids every day, but if they did, they wouldn’t be able to hang up their hats so quickly over troubled waters. You’ve got all kinds of factors that contributed to the speedy decision. I would say the largest ones being that they can financially do so with the help of stardom. Their kids will get the house and they will rotate in it, how marvellous I also can see how the fact that the whole world was watching would push the divorce button to just “make it all go away” so to speak.

Even the best of marriages and families would have a hard time at sustaining a certain image for many years on “reality” television. When you think about it, I can’t name one that hasn’t been tarnished in some way. It’s probably amazing they lasted as long as they did.

So what’s the show going to be called now? Kate Plus Eight and Jon Sometimes? Of course it’s not funny, but it’s “reality”. In their last interviews I saw , only a few things stood out that were really important. One that Kate had no problem wiping herself off and “steering the ship” by herself. I think she did much of the steering before. Maybe that’s why Jon is so angry Kate? Especially after the whole world has pointed it out to him? He says he has communication problems. No, I think he’s communicated his anger quite clearly, but in a hurtful way. He says, I’m only 31. In translation this means, I am still attractive enough to get attention and get laid.

These people asked for this, but they didn’t. After having 8 children and barely being able to physically survive, who would really say no to reality television? There are child labor laws being brought to the table. If they didn’t have the show, do you really think they would have dogs, crooked playhouses and the great life they’ve been able to acquire (minus the media attention)? They have struggled and managed to survive a long time under the spotlight but forever is a foreign concept these days and in Hollywood it’s almost non-existent.

I’m still amazed by one little fact though, eight kids yet no counseling? I’m not sure there’s anything too “realistic” about that.

At the same time that his music and talent seemed to be such a great blessing, it robbed him of a childhood and seemed to torment his spirit and life.

So what do I think of when I think about the pop legend? I think first about the fact that his Thriller album was the only record that we had in the daycare I attended at the age of 8 years old. I can remember plugging in these huge headphones and sitting there for hours just listening to the beats over and over. I remember some of his following cd’s and while I continued to listen throughout the years, nothing ever captivated like the Thriller album.

There are very few albums that are timeless or that you can introduce your kids to, but that is one of them. Thriller comes on every Halloween.

So after the music is the life. There is the drama with his family, relationships and physical alterations. There were the accusations of child molestation and over the top spending which added to the financial legal woes. As I sat watching a 60 minutes episode where they interviewed him about the molestation allegations during the time of media phrases like “wacko jacko” and “jesus juice”, I’m reminded of the opinion that I formed about it all way back then.

I listened to him talk and his mouse like effort in defending himself and concluded the allegations were false. What was he guilty of? To me it was pretty apparent that he was guilty of never being able to let go of the childhood he felt he missed out on. He never got over it and he never was able to appreciate the childhood he did have with the good and the bad. He was raised in a strict Jehovah Witness home and you can tell that from his upbringing his beliefs would’ve strayed from mainstream regardless his experience as a pop star.

So what happened when people could not understand his need to live his childhood as an adult? It got ugly, really ugly. He was one of those naive, wanting to believe the best in people, people. He had a childlike mind, and he could afford to have it. He could live every day at the Neverland Ranch and keep friends with the same mental state which did happen to be young boys. As far as the sex part of it, I believe he was almost one of those A-sexual people who was brought up associating sex as a nasty, sinful thing and therefore had a dysfunctional relationship with it. However it didn’t mean that he took advantage of his “friends” sexually.

Like most people, I pity his soul while it was here on earth because it definitely seems as if it was a wounded one. But out of that great despair came something even greater which was his music and his story that will live on forever.

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Oh, I’m sure there are tons of nay sayers and retards out there that feel this show was a horrible idea. I’m sure they think that a show like this somehow promotes teenage pregnancy or says that it’s okay to have children before you have barely learned your own ABC’s.

In actuality it’s probably one of the most needed shows on television for young audiences. Unfortunately so many of the teens that find themselves in this position are delusional. They have no real concept of the reality of sex, it’s consequences and the havoc that it can reek on not only their lives but their parents as well.

The episode I saw showed the poor girl trying to go to school and take care of the child in between homework and lectures to the “father” about doing his share. You can tell that adding a baby to their equation took their life from not so great to worse in a matter of weeks. The only way someone could watch that and choose to still have a child is if they would think their experience would somehow be different. I guess hormones and “love” can do that to a poor young soul?

As an adult with children already, I find it educational to watch what goes on in the aftermath of a child having a child. I find it fascinating to watch the parents reactions and think of my own. It seems most of the teens that end up having a child while they are still living at home, have parents that somehow lead them to believe that it’s okay to do so and they will help take care of the child as well. And while this may seem to be the most caring and compassionate stance, for the life of me I can’t understand why they would? Do they just want more children in the house or another child themselves?

I had a friend in high school who had a baby and her mother told her that she would help her with the child. Ultimately she was the one who ended up raising him for the most part and her daughter ended up spending most of her time hearing about it.

Hey, as the adult, you ultimately call the shots in your home. And while you are legally responsible til they are 18, you are not after that. How many children would choose to have a child if they really knew they would be the ones fully responsible, whether in one year or three? My guess is not so many. No one is knowledgeable in these areas until they either experience it or see for themselves what that life choice is all about. Maybe this show is a little bit of a start?

I can personally say that out of my very few close friends, three of them are in their 30’s and still child-free. When you talk to them about it, all of them make references to wanting to be mothers but simply aren’t at a comfortable place for themselves to have a child or they haven’t found someone that they want to have children with. One friend says that her and her guy had the discussion and it came to the “who wants to bring a child into this world” philosophy.

When you really stop and think about it, there’s absolutely nothing logical about having children. If you are an adult making a conscious decision to get pregnant, there’s probably some sort of lapse in judgment that is caused by emotions and the heart.

There aren’t the same pressures by society to have children. If anything, now it’s to have less of them. “Save the planet, have less kids!”. Being a mother, I’m not offended, I actually agree. Sometimes I’m glad I had the choice to have children, at other times I wish I wouldn’t have.

My experience has been written and I am at peace with it, however even though I would love to have a grandchild or two (one or two at the most, BTW! I would love even more for my children to be at peace with their lives without having children. Or if they did, it was made through the decision to adopt one that was already here and needed parents. That’s probably the only responsible way to parent unless you were blessed with excellent DNA and flawless parenting qualities.

There’s no doubt that the face of parents in our generation is changing. Sure, there are still the “sixteen and pregnant’s” (which I will do my next post on) but there are more and more people who are using their heads as much as they are their hearts when it comes to this life and planet changing decision.

I hear the parents that view telling the realities of parenting is complaining. And while none of us want to feel like we are whiners who complain about the great joys we have been blessed with or to seem as if we are somehow ungrateful, there’s something therapeutic about being able to acknowledge your feelings.

You start out with the line of “I couldn’t imagine my life without them”, which of course I couldn’t and why would you at this point? However, let’s break down a typical weekend with children and see what conclusions are drawn.

Friday evening the weekend begins by picking up the youngest two at daycare. Sometimes they are happy to see you, sometimes not so happy. If it is the not so happy time they may ignore you as if you are some perverse stranger they have never seen before. If they do acknowledge you on a happy to see you day, they may begin to ask you for things like gum or a new bike. Yes their desires can vary from minor to major.

Then there is a trip to the grocery store. We must get the car buggy or there will be major breakdown. Doesn’t matter if you must run, steal or deal with a soak and wet one, you must get the race car buggy. If all goes well in the store, there will be nothing broken or heads turned in the direction of high pitch screaming or pinches or jabs exchanged from two kids being trapped too closely in the buggy.

Then there is an hour to pick up the oldest. While he can be very helpful with the younger ones, he can also add to the chaos and easily make it worse. Informing can quickly become tattle tailing at it’s worst and with boys there can be borderline abuse towards the youngest without constant reminding of how little he is in comparison.

Saturday comes and one of my joys is sleeping in. There’s always one particular early riser in my house, however he has never found himself in trouble by himself other than some scattered cereal or crumbs from his morning hunger. I get to usually sleep til 8:30am which is heaven sent compared to my usual 6am risings. No complaints there with my kids now that they are older!

But once the day starts, it starts. There is the cooking, cleaning, laundry that begins and doesn’t end until Sunday evening. There is the instructing, the breaking up fights, the “don’t talk backs”, the searching for things that are lost, the locating outfits, the bathing, the preparation of activities and things to do.

In the summer we are good because it’s pool time, and minus of the worrying over snacks and foods (who gets what and when) it’s not too hellacious. They usually don’t want to leave which can be a struggle and there are the possible exhaustion tantrums (usually not coming from me) but it is well worth a day of them being occupied.

Then it’s back to the house for more meal preparation and dishes to clean up. Gotta get the chlorine out of that hair, so more baths. Maybe we can relax just long enough to watch a family movie. There’s usually at least one spilled drink and popcorn along with a “guys sit down, watch the movie and stop the pillow fighting”.

Finally by 10pm I’m so tired that when my head hits the pillow, an earthquake couldn’t wake me. That is until 2am whimpering comes from the bedroom after someone has peed in the bed. The same guilty party has a habit of eating too much and vomiting, especially when he’s chosen to sleep with his older brother. There’s nothing like mopping up urine or vomit, giving more baths and doing laundry at 2am.

Sunday is the same but usually not as tiring because I try and make it a point to stay put. No worrying over fixing hair, picking out outfits or taking two hours to get in the car. There’s still of course still the usual messes to clean up and “gentle” reminders of “stop that!” throughout the day.

And while I will end this with some of the same sweet parent talk that is constantly around us that speaks of the joy of hearing their laughter, the fascination you experience as you watch them grow and the warm fuzzies that you get as they cling to your every word and leg for that matter, I will still say that parenting is the hardest yet most invisible job going and anyone that doesn’t speak the truth about it is in denial or at the least doing it an injustice.

At first glance, I have no clue as to what they are talking about. But now that I’m thinking about it, I wonder if it has to do with her kids being on the show? Ding ding, I’ve scored a point huh? I didn’t take time to pick it up and do my own further investigation, so I’m still not sure even still at this point though. If that’s the case then is this the first time they’ve ever looked at parents who put their children in the limelight?

It brings up an interesting topic. Were Jon and Kate wrong for allowing camera’s into their homes with such small children? Were they looking for a way out of all the chaos, yet rather just created more of it? I can’t imagine what all of this means for not only them but for their children as well. Will they ever live all of this down? Will it ever end as long as they are still making shows? Did they unknowingly ask for all of this? They couldn’t have possibly suspected that it could turn so ugly, so quick.

And what is behind the whole “mean mom” theory? I could tell you from the first time watching the show that she wasn’t the most kindest and loving person, therefore mother on the planet. Wasn’t that part of the appeal? I get the “mean” spill from my own children all of the time. Especially when I won’t give them whatever it is they are asking for at the time. I probably pride myself off of this fact, but if I were on television it seems I’d probably be destroyed as well.

Looks like the media train has taken them on like they did Brittney Spears. It’s everywhere and it’s been for months and is unlikely to go away anytime soon. The obsession has went from mild to hot and it looks like there are more and more judgments that will need to be made for these parents who allowed the world into their home.

How did this all start again? Oh yes, our fascination with a woman who was able and crazy enough to have so many children. And for those who didn’t find that entertaining enough, we turn it into a real life soap opera. As they say, the media monster only builds you up in order to tear you down. I just hope that Kate is “mean” enough to protect and keep her family grounded through it all.

First is that I’ve had a bit of trouble out of my current fifth grader. In fifth grade the material begins to be more challenging, plus you have the hormones kicking in which doesn’t help with the talking in class, not listening and being a little rebellious. So when it has came to grades this year, my A&B student dropped to a C. But since he’s not ever had any issues in the past with EOG’s, I didn’t think too much about it until a friend of mine called and said her fifth grader didn’t pass.

So when mine said he didn’t pass, I was not happy but I wasn’t totally hit out of the blue. He took 3 tests…science, reading and math. He failed his reading and his science. Why he’s failed his reading I have no clue because the last book he was reading was one of the latest Harry Potter which looks like it took a huge oak tree to make.

While they were in school, they were only given the results on the science. I asked how many kids failed out of the 19 in his class and he said 7 which would be about 35% of the class. That was only on one out of the three tests so when you think about it, there was probably at least 50% that failed at least one test when you look at all three.

What does this mean? This means study, tutor, study for the next week or so until re-testing. What does it mean for those who fail one test by one point again? It means they must repeat the 5th grade.

In the past there has been summer school which according to radio announcements and my kids school office, will no longer be an option this year in NC. So when they were thinking about cutting this small feature out of the budget, were they really thinking about the results? Cutting out summer school may cut costs now, but what about the ones in the future? If there are a much larger population of students that end up repeating grades due to end of year testing, won’t this simply mean more tax paying dollars spent on educating these same kids for multiple years? Keep in mind, some of these same kids make good grades all year, yet can fail a test by a point and be held back for an entire year…talk about pressure.

I’ve never quite agreed with the testing systems that are in place in the first place. However without a safety net for the kids that don’t test well or need a few extra weeks of learning time, I think the consequences are going to be much greater than what was ever considered.

Since I feel terribly guilty for slamming one mom’s blog post, I’ll quickly give love to anothers Here’s a post from a mom’s who’s plugging herself and her talents and there’s nothing to hate on concerning that! She takes some nice photogs! Mom Photographer

I just love when parents encourage and love for their children to have close relationships. Sure, there will be moments with them all and I’m sure some brothers and sisters are so different that getting them to connect is as likely as acid wash coming back, but for all the parents out there that spot it and encourage it, I’m on board. Sister Love

I’m fascinated by adoption and their stories. I’m perplexed how unnatural, yet natural this part of our experience is. Here’s a post and a blog that can give great insight on it. Adoption Experience

This blogger is on a mission & it’s definitely strays a bit from taking pictures of Charlie peeing into the cheerio. I’m not suggesting you may be able to survive through the whole post (it’s a long one) but damn if it doesn’t make alot of sense! Bravo! Teaching Children 

Some of it makes sense concerning the cost of transportation and it’s impact on the environment. There have been talks about cutting work weeks down to 4 day weeks, especially when people were paying as much to get to work as they were making there. If there were some congruency between the work and school week for the sake of parents, then I probably wouldn’t be opposed. I’m not quite sure if kids would be less able to obtain information in longer periods of time or not?

If you ask me where this is all going, I’d say that government simply doesn’t want to spend so much on education (big revelation there, huh?). It appears that all of this is happening because of the economy, however I think some major changes to the ways our children are educated are happening for other reasons as well.

Schools have been over-crowded for years now and unless you have the funds to pay for your child to go to schools where the teacher to child ratio is adequate and children are looked at less as numbers, then the kid is going to be short changed. Our children already fall behind when it comes to education, so what’s going to happen with these new budget cuts that eliminate teachers and beneficial programs that enrich their lives?

I’ve seen the innovative schools that Bill Gates has tried to help get started where children aren’t limited by traditional and outdated learning methods. But there is only so much that private funds can do and that only lights the fire, it doesn’t keep it burning. So how many parents and children are dependent on this crippled education system and how is it going to impact future generations and our world as a whole? The average parent can’t affort do pay for private education and usually it’s the same working class that doesn’t have the time to teach their children at home all that they need to learn.

When it comes to having children, mostly everyone has their own personal ideas on what the appropriate age is. I have a few childless friends that have passed the 30th birthday mark and who are not so sure that having children will be part of their life story.

Until recently, I didn’t know that my twins father had the cut off of 35. I was actually a little surprised because we were only a few years shy of that birthday before we had the twins and he had never told me his thoughts on it. I personally can’t ever remember having that magical age in my head when it came to having children but I knew I didn’t want to be 50 and worrying about teenagers and as it stands, I won’t be.

Everyone is different, therefore so are their limitations and capabilities when it comes having children. We can’t begin to discriminate based on age unless we want to open a whole other can of worms with deciding other criteria for having children as well. Sometimes I think freedom or rights should be restricted when it comes to infringing on those of others, but who would be the decision makers when it comes to that stuff? How many activist are out there fighting for a child’s rights after they are born?

Let’s face it. Many children get the short end of the stick because of who they are born to and where every day. Who is to determine a little healthy adversity versus borderline cruelty?

Maybe this woman who made this decision has this child’s life well planned out and will live to be at least 80 (even though they say giving birth subtracts years off of your life) and she will see his 14th birthday. Maybe she’s into breaking records and is proving that anything is possible? Maybe she’s just being ignorantly selfish and willfully creating a difficult life for not only herself but the unborn child as well? Ultimately we will never know, but one thing that we know for sure is that she obviously didn’t have a cut off date.