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Obsessed With Our Kids?
Is being obsessed with being a parent okay? lol - I guess I ask this because the roles of parents have changed a lot over the past 100 years. While having children has always been a sort of way of life for many, the role that it plays in life can completely vary from one person to the next and from one generation to the next.
It seems that past generations had kids (many of them) to help on the farm or to pass on certain heritage or legacy. Now it seems people have kids more as a status symbol or to give their lives meaning or purpose. I’m not sure, maybe I’m off base with it, but it does seem that way to me.
So while it seems to be an okay and accepted thing to run around with “so in so’s Mom” on your license plate or whatever, is it borderline obsession/unhealthy or is it being a “good parent?”
I think I tend to lean toward the unhealthy side of things. When all you can think or talk about is your kids, then doesn’t there seem to be something missing? Don’t get me wrong, I love my kids. I think about and talk about them often. But for me, it’s just one aspect of my life (although one of the most important ones) and I find it puzzling that some women do not struggle with even seeking balance.
I recently read someone who commented on Facebook when they were basically giving a “shout out” to their kid, and she wrote something to the extent of “my life meant nothing before I had you” etc. Really? While many others commented or liked what was written etc., I just thought, yes, in society, we actually cheer these kinds of thoughts and behaviors. To me, it’s just weird…but I’m probably just alone in my thoughts, lol.
For me personally I know that being a first time mom I didn’t go to that extreme, but like most I did put all of my eggs in the motherhood basket for the first three years of my eldest life. But after 3 years of doing nothing but eating, drinking and sleeping him, I was spent. So it took a lot of restructuring and after having more children I figured out that I had to find more balance and recognize when to give to them and when I needed to give to myself…whether I was judged harshly for it or not.
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