After an 11-year-old child was tasered recently after becoming violent and causing injury to a police officer, the old debate of how to discipline is put back on the table. There really are two sides to every story as we know, and this one is no different. Not in versions of the story, but in reason and just cause for people to feel the way they do.

There is the side that says the girl deserved it. Surely this isn’t her only run in with trouble. The whole incident started by someone saying that she pushed another kid into street. After being singled out for it, she started pushing class furniture and even spit on a teacher. Then when the officer tried to escort her to the principals office, she got a nice big punch right in the nose. So if the officer handled the situation improperly, then what was the alternative? Apparently 11-year-olds can be pretty big in size these days. Was the officer or anyone else to suffer more physical abuse from this child?

Then there is the side like the mother that says she has no clue how her child went to school early one day and resides in jail the later part. After all, everyone should understand that her child has the mentality of a five-year-old. Regardless of a child’s actions, because of the age, there shouldn’t be the usage of force.

This issue goes much further than whether a child should be tasered or not. Look at the big debate on whether or not we should spank our children, and if so, what age is appropriate?

A friend of mine recently traveled to New Zealand where it is against the law to spank your children. If you are seen spanking a child in public, you are immediately arrested and sent to jail. The problem he observed…kids seemed completely out of control there.

The fact is, there is no question that children need boundaries and consequences for their actions if they are to learn anything or grow up to be productive and responsible. The only debate is how that is to be enforced. There is no doubt that violence perpetuates violence and that there is a thin line between a child being spanked as a consequence and physical abuse. For the most part in this country, parenting is not a regulated procedure. Why? Probably because no one truly has the answer.

In order to say that a child should not be physically punished for bad behavior, especially when it’s bad physical behavior the child displays, then we must have a replacement. You can tell a child not to eat chips and candy all day, but if you don’t find a substitute like apples and yogurt that is readily available and accessible, then what’s the child to do? Sure there have been efforts put in towards alternatives, but how effective or widespread have they been? Obviously not very much with the dilemma’s we are still experiencing today.

So far, what is the replacement that is more advanced then the day’s of “off with their head”, not anything that is much further from that. For not only this child, but for millions of other “grown up children” the consequence is jail, isolation, the taking away of freedoms…maybe some community service. These aren’t too far from typical punishment for our children at home either. However, there is of course also the electric chair. Is this child on a path that is far from that? With the shock of a taser already at the age of 11, it doesn’t seem so.

So what is the alternative to taser’s and electric chair’s? My guess is probably better equipped parents with proper parenting skills who can provide a loving, nurturing and knowing atmosphere for the child that doesn’t hold too much or at least minimal dysfunction. How often does that happen, maybe in 1 out of 100 homes or less? Just another one of my guesses.

Sure you can try to rehabilitate people, but the chances of them being completely rehabilitated in order to function peacefully and have anything to offer or give the world, are little to none once the damage has been done. So who’s going to begin starting at the root of the problem, rather than trying to band-aid the symptoms? Who has the time, energy, money and resources for investing in the education and healing of parents or the populations that are having the children? Dysfunction runs rampid in the world…in adults, therefore of course their children. The dysfunctional have children. Don’t blame the child, the cop or choose sides. They are both just victims and the latest actors on stage. Look around at the world they came from, that we live in and the system in which we all operate out of.